Life lessons I wish I had Known Sooner

Cindy Tillory Avatar

YouTuber Lavendaire has a video called 10 Money Lessons I Wish I Learned Earlier 💸 which inspired me to write about my own lessons I’ve learned. Some were from situations or people I met, others were gradual learnings. Granted these are not just about money and finances, but about me as a whole person who had to learn, grow, and change.

one person doesn’t need to fit every role in your life. 

Whether it’s relationships or friendships, never put your eggs in one basket. Mostly because that friend or loved one will get burned out and also it’s just super unhealthy and unrealistic to have just one person to fill all your needs. When I was younger I had one friend at a time. Whenever they would get burned out –or if we fought– I felt like my whole world was crashing down because in a way it was. I have since learned that I can’t always rely on one person and that there are multiple people who love and care for me that I can interact with.

It’s your life, live it.

I have spent much of my life living in a place of judgment and fear. I would judge myself for interacting in certain ways with people or how I was supposed to act around others and had a generalized fear of essentially everything. If it was a good thing something bad was coming around the corner, if it was bad it simply confirmed my preconceived bias. I was living in my amygdala, frozen in fear. I remembered when my therapist told me that “inaction is a decision” it struck a chord with me. And I began to realize that it was my life and that I chose to live it.

prioritize future-you

This one is something I’m still working on right now. I have a tendency to think only about my wants desires and needs of the moment and forget about what I may need in the future. I do this primarily with my money, rarely prioritizing the needs of my future self. I’ve been getting better at it, squaring money away for later rather than using it all up, but I can help but look back at my former decisions and cringe.

Manage your energy, not your time.

I am unapologetically a morning person. I love waking up early at about 5:30 am and getting stuff done before noon even starts, that being said my energy dies out around 4:30 and I cant perk it up with caffeine because I won’t be able to sleep at night. This has in many ways caused many a problem to my schedule and my life. So what did I do? I did the only thing a type-A personality can do, I made a schedule. two and a half hours for morning stuff: brushing my teeth, starting my day, writing in my digital journal. 8 am to 12 pm for school work (my classes are online so that helps tremendously) 12-1 for lunch and 1 pm to 4 pm for anything extra like writing and researching for an essay, taking lecture notes, finishing any late assignments. That sort of stuff.

By having a set time frame with space for relaxation and decompression I can get more done.

Evaluate the source

I’ve been thinking about deep-fakes recently since it was on a podcast I listen to called Hannalyze This. so the thing about deep fakes is that to figure out if it’s a lie or not you have to consider the source. Sometimes we meet people who will tell us not the truth but what we want to hear whether that is negative or positive. It might even be about ourselves. When this happens you should ask yourself these questions:

  1. Who is this person?
  2. Why do they matter?
  3. What do they gain by telling me this information?

The reason I say “information” is that just because you think that it’s true, doesn’t make it true. What makes it information is that it is trying to convey something to you. True or false, it’s sending a message. And if that message hits your core beliefs about yourself or your world, all the more reason to question it.

So that’s all I have for today. I encourage you to think about your own life lessons, when did you learn about them? Were they gradual for you or was there a person or situation that changed things for you?

Oh and by the way I’m on Instagram and Facebook check them out if you feel so inclined.

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